How to Practice Gratitude (Because It’s Food for the Soul)

Next week is Thanksgiving, and although 2020 has been a wild year, there’s still much to be grateful for. 

Last year around this time I was writing about why we should have gratitude all year long, not just around the holidays. I stand by that, and in the past year I’ve learned a lot about the importance of gratitude. 

This year I wanted to share some new tools that I’ve used and seen because practicing gratitude intentionally every day has changed my life, and I think if you tried it it could change yours, too.

What is Gratitude & Why is it Important?

To be grateful means, “showing or expressing thanks, especially to another person” (Cambridge Dictionary). Gratitude doesn’t always have to be directed at a person, though. 

You can be grateful for events that happen to you, actions someone takes toward you, an inner quality, or even objects that just make your day better. For instance, when I think about what I’m grateful for in the morning, I often include things like the sunny day or my passion for words. 

While being grateful might seem simple, it’s incredibly powerful. As you probably know, sometimes bad days or bad experiences can make gratitude a lot harder to think about. Sometimes we just want to wallow in whatever negative mindset we’re feeling. 

And to an extent, that’s healthy. Having a full spectrum of emotion is a very human thing! But, just because we might be in the depths of despair, as one of my favorite characters always says, doesn’t necessarily mean there’s nothing positive or impactful happening. Unfortunately, most of life’s hardest lessons are learned the messy way and we only really appreciate them and become grateful for them later in life. 

How Gratitude Can Change Your Life

I’ve always been someone who expressed gratitude, but it wasn’t until this year that I decided to make a daily practice of it. I initially thought it was something that was nice, but that maybe people who wrote about the positive effects were kind of exaggerating. 

I mean, could one simple act of thinking about something really do that much? 

The stunning answer is actually yes! (Obviously I had to learn this the hard way.)

Although there are probably a thousand reasons we should practice gratitude, I wanted to focus on 3 major ways that gratitude can drastically change your life. These are things most of us strive for, but many people get stuck on the “how” part.

1. Make you happier - Can you imagine waking up and starting your day thinking about the good parts of your life instead of social media or email or the fact that you don’t want to go to work (even if you work from home)? Thinking about what you’re grateful for makes you happier. I mean, it makes sense, right? Focusing on the good rather than the bad increases happiness about where you are right now. I’m not the only one who thinks that, either!

2. Make you more satisfied - If you are thinking about what you’re grateful for once or twice a day, it means that you are thinking about your life in the present moment. Sometimes it’s harder to find things to be grateful for than others, but it really makes you stop and think about the good. And when you can see the good in your life, you’re much more likely to be satisfied. This is especially important in a world that’s constantly encouraging the extra “grind” to be better, get more, and do all the things. Gratitude helps you appreciate the now.

3. Change your outlook on the future - When you can appreciate the now and think positively about it, you can change your future. More doors seem to be open (or at least within viewing distance), more possibilities seem to present themselves, and life just feels...better. It’s not necessarily even that your life feels awesome right now, or that you don’t want to achieve more than you have right now. When you can look at the current positives, though, you can imagine even bigger, more exciting possibilities for the future, and that’s priceless.

3 Ways to Practice Gratitude

It seems like a no-brainer that if you can be happier, more satisfied, and change your outlook on life - all HUGE  promises - that you’d want to at least investigate the “how to” part, right? 

Most of us are busy and the thought of another thing “to do” might be cringe-worthy. But, I promise that practicing gratitude doesn’t have to be time consuming. There are multiple ways to begin, so I’ll share a few and you can choose a place to start.

Morning & Evening Lists

I journal every morning, so I track my morning gratitude there. I simply write down 3-5 things in list format every day when I’ve done my writing and move on. This portion of my journaling literally takes 30 seconds or less. 

In the evening, I use an app called Pixels to log my day, and I note 10 things I’m grateful for in my log there. If it seems like a lot - it is! But, it does make me consider the small joyful pieces of the day that would otherwise likely be overlooked.

Gratitude Log

If you don’t journal (I don’t blame you, it is a time commitment - maybe I could convince you to try that, too?), I’ve created a printable log for gratitude. You can print it out as many times as you want and it’s very low key. 

There’s a place to put a date and a box for you to write what you’re grateful for each day. That’s it! Not a lot of other clutter, so you won’t be distracted. You could also do multiple notes for one date if you wanted, like I do, and it will be very neat and tidy when you look back at it.

GET IT HERE

Gratitude Journal

I’ve also created a gratitude journal if you’re wanting a little more inspiration to get you started on your intentional gratitude journey! It includes 5 weeks of entries with multiple inspirational quotes for each week. It’s undated so you can print it again when the month is over.

GET IT HERE

---

Next Steps

I don’t make promises often, in part because I don’t promise things I can’t follow through on. Gratitude, however, is one of the things that I’m willing to promise will change your life. When you’re intentional about it every day, you’ll be happier, more satisfied, and your outlook on life will be much more open and positive. 

With that in mind, here’s what to do next:

1. Think about what you’re grateful for. Take a few moments right now to think about a few things that you’re grateful for in your life. 

2. Figure out a way to document your gratitude. Check out the gratitude log and the gratitude journal and see if one of them appeals to you! If you’re already a journaler, you can start by making a space for it each day, too. 

3. Make a plan to reflect on what you’re grateful for. Sometimes life is complicated and it’s just plain hard to figure out what the good pieces are. I get it! Especially with the pandemic going on and everything else that has happened this year. If you need some help, I can always work with you on figuring out what tracking method might be best for you, and how to start creating that habit. Click here to read more about working with me.
   

My challenge to you is to name something you’re grateful for right now, and then figure out a way to create a daily gratitude habit.

Do you practice gratitude? Have you used one of the tools I mentioned? Do you have a different tool that you use to track gratitude? I’d love to hear about your experiences and recommendations! Find me on social media or drop a comment below.

Let’s chat because you, my friend, are on your way to great writing.

Interview with an Author: Karisa Keasey

Our surprise November guest is Karisa Keasey.

Award winning artist, Karisa Keasey, has been using her paintings to raise awareness and funds for the most marginalized people in the world for over 6 years. After visiting an orphanage in India during college, she could no longer paint without a purpose. After earning a degree in studio arts from George Fox University in 2013, she began her philanthropic journey of creativity by giving a percentage of all her proceeds to charitable organizations. Karisa currently lives in the greater Seattle area where she paints and speaks full time.

If you would like to purchase Karisa Keasey’s book, When You Can’t Go Home, you can find a copy here.

Tell us a little about your writing journey. Have you always wanted to be a writer?

Before this book, I never considered myself a writer. I’ve always struggled with grammar and conventions, so the idea of others reading my writing was a huge fear of mine. I feel more comfortable telling stories through my paintings. However, when I came up with the idea for When You Can’t Go Home, I decided it would be most powerful with both the paintings and the written story. I had to overcome some of my fears to write it, but I am very pleased with how it turned out in the end.

Was there a certain point you remember where you felt empowered to call yourself a writer? Or have you always felt like you were a writer?

I would still say I am more of a story-teller than a writer. I have always endeavored to tell stories through my paintings and writing became another medium to tell people’s stories. The shift for me was that I saw a need to spread empathy for my refugee neighbors and meeting that need was more important than my own comfort zone. Sometimes it just takes finding purpose greater than your fear to write.

Sometimes it just takes finding purpose greater than your fear to write.

What was the process of writing the refugee’s stories in your book, When You Can’t Go Home? Did they help you with the descriptions when you were writing as if they were still in the moment, or was that more of your own creative writing take on their story?

Throughout the entire process of writing, I checked with the families on each draft to make sure I was telling their story in a way THEY were comfortable with. I combined my extensive research with their story to give context to the situation. The point of the book, and this project, is to amplify their stories, not mine. 

It made the writing process longer and more tedious, but it was a humbling and an emotionally intimate process with each of the book participants. I wanted to make the stories as beautiful and expressive as I could, while maintaining the reality of the stories. I am so thankful that each participant trusted me with their story and allowed me the liberty to bring it to life.

Along with writing these stories, you also painted pictures of each of the refugees. How do you think that changed your experience with them overall? Did it pull you deeper into their lives/stories and/or connect you with them more?

I’ve been painting professionally for ten years, and every time I paint a portrait I feel an empathetic connection to that person. I often use that time to pray for them, think about how they impact my life and the world around us. Art has the power to generate empathy both in the maker and the viewer, and that is my goal— to humanize the refugee experience.

How has your experience talking with refugees impacted you as a writer and artist?

I initially started this project with a hope to correct other peoples’ misconceptions of refugees. However, I quickly realized that I had my own misconceptions that needed to be addressed. I had unconsciously developed an expectation that I would somehow “save” them.

As a writer and artist, I think it is important to keep my expectations in check and humbly listen and not speak on anyone’s behalf.

It was tempting to force a particular narrative or lead it in a way that I thought would work better. The truth is, I only play a small role in the lives they are building for themselves. As a writer and artist, I think it is important to keep my expectations in check and humbly listen and not speak on anyone’s behalf.

“Kadijah & Umair” - A painting from When You Can’t Go Home

Describe your writing and/or creative process.

Relationship is important to me and is at the center of all that I do. It was a priority of mine to get to know each participant as a person and friend before I wrote about them. We met multiple times over tea, picnics, and even musical jams before I jumped into the writing and painting process. It took me two years to complete the 30 paintings and 10 stories. We brought my talented friend, Natlie Malis, with us to take photos as we talked with the participants. I directed the photo shoots while I interviewed the book participants. 

Once we had finished the initial interviews, I started painting. I love watercolor and playing with the contrast between hyper realism and impressionism on the same piece, creating a focal point on the faces. I work slowly, using many layers to create a sense of depth. The writing process was definitely the hardest part, as I had never done it professionally before. I wanted to give each family the honor and respect they deserve. I had to do many drafts and had friends, family, and the participants read them over and give me feedback as I wrote.

What was the research process like for your book? How did you find the people whose stories you told?

A few years ago, I became aware of a massive disconnect between how refugees are often portrayed and who they actually are. The media often portrays refugees as villains, saints, or victims. They are none of these. They are everyday people just like anyone else. I contacted World Relief, a nationwide non-profit that helps refugees resettle in the US.

The media often portrays refugees as villains, saints, or victims. They are none of these. They are everyday people just like anyone else.

Everyone in the book came through World Relief to resettle and jumped at the opportunity to share their story in a way that would help other refugees like themselves. I made sure to choose participants from various countries, religions, and experiences to show how broad the refugee experience can be. I learned that no two are identical and we can’t put them in a box. I spent a lot of time reading articles from many different sources and watching documentaries to get a fuller sense of the circumstances many refugees are facing.

What was your biggest writing obstacle and how did you overcome it?

I wanted to make sure that there are as many cultures and religions represented as possible in When You Can’t Go Home. Experiencing and learning about other cultures was one of the most enriching and humbling parts of the whole process, and also one of the biggest challenges. Lingual and cultural barriers made it difficult to communicate at times and forced me out of my comfort zone.

I remember the feeling I had before my first interview with Taghreed. Even though she was the most welcoming host one could ask for, I was painfully nervous. I didn’t know much about her culture and I didn’t want to say or do something that would offend her. After our visit, my husband and I climbed back into our car. I told him that I didn’t think I could do this project. I felt like I was too awkward, uninformed, and unequipped. Were my resources and gifts adequate enough to take on this challenge? Suddenly, I realized the hypocrisy of my words—what I felt for those two short hours is only a sliver of what refugees feel every day.

Suddenly, I realized the hypocrisy of my words—what I felt for those two short hours is only a sliver of what refugees feel every day.

Refugees are forced from their homes and placed in a drastically new country. What side of the street do cars drive on? How do they enroll their children in school? Go grocery shopping? Pay taxes? Rent? And for some, they may not even know how to use running water. Refugees don’t get the privilege of wondering if their resources and abilities are enough. They have to use whatever they have to survive. I made blundering mistakes. Multiple times I had to take a necessary piece of humble pie to realize that this project was not about me. It was, and always has been, about amplifying the voices of refugees. 

Karisa with paintings from When You Can’t Go Home

What is the part of your published work or writing process you are most proud of?

Merhawi, another one of the book participants, thanked me tearfully when I finally got to hand him the finished book. He told me how meaningful it would be to share his story with his children someday as they flip through the pages. Another participant was able to use the book as part of his application for a college scholarship that he earned. These and many other moments like these make me feel so privileged to have been able to work on this project. These are the people I want in my community and I am so proud to help other people see them that way too.

What motivates you to keep writing?

Relationships. The most important moments of this project are the conversations I have had with strangers and change their hostile views of refugees to compassionate ones. As long as I can hold a paint brush and form words I can be a conduit for justice and empathy in my community and world. Art, both writing and painting, generates empathy and empathy is the weapon of social justice.

What is the biggest piece of advice you would give to aspiring writers?

When I first came to World Relief with the idea of writing this book, I was met with a bit of skepticism. I was expecting them to be as excited as I was about the project, but they did not seem to be. I later learned that many people come to them offering up grand, exciting ideas, only to abandon them before they are finished. People are often quick to pitch ideas, but rarely execute on them. 

My biggest advice to aspiring artists and writers would be to be the kind of person that shows up, and keeps showing up, even when it gets hard.

I slowly gained their trust over the two years that it took to finish When You Can’t Go Home by working through the struggles and showing up regularly. My biggest advice to aspiring artists and writers would be to be the kind of person that shows up, and keeps showing up, even when it gets hard. A finished book is better than a perfect book that never gets finished.

If you would like to purchase Karisa Keasey’s book, When You Can’t Go Home, you can find a copy here.

If you know an author (or of an author) you would love to read an interview with, email me at rachel@capturingyourconfidence.com or submit a suggestion through the contact page!

How to Check Your Unrealistic Expectations at the Door

We’ve all been there: you set a New Year’s Resolution or a goal throughout the year, only to get to November and December and realize that you have failed to live up to your own expectations. 

When we don’t live up to our own high standards, we feel bad. Like, unmotivated and questioning whether to keep writing bad. 

Have you ever felt this way? 

I know I have. 

Why do Writers Have Unrealistic Expectations? 

Writers are a special kind of people. I won’t claim that there’s only one way to be a writer, because I hate generalizations - they’re always untrue. 

Even when there are elements of fact, putting a whole group of people together like that takes the human uniqueness out of the equation, which is actually one of the most important parts of writing and being a writer. 

What I will claim is that most writers have a similar mentality when they set unrealistic expectations. 

They want to meet the expectations.

Writers set standards to help themselves grow and develop their craft. They want to be better, so they set their expectations high thinking they will be able to easily learn and be better. I’m all about growth mindset, but putting the pressure of unrealistic expectations on yourself will actually hinder your ability to grow as much as you want. 

Writers set standards to help themselves grow and develop their craft.

For example, who DOESN’T want to write a novel and have it be perfect on the first draft? How cool would that be? Just because we want it, doesn’t mean it’s realistic, though. 

They think they can meet the expectations.

Because we are on a journey to be better, and many writers are excellent learners, it stands to reason that we might think we can meet the unrealistic expectations. It’s one of those things we might find ourselves saying, “Oh, well I’m different than so-and-so who couldn’t do that” when in reality, we’re really not that different from so-and-so. 

Realistically, if you haven’t developed a regular writing routine, are you going to be able to write the next Great American Novel in the next 90 days? Probably not. You might be able to have a draft of a novel in that time, but it’s unlikely to become a canonical classic this year, if it even does within your lifetime.

They underestimate the amount of work involved in writing.

I have a lot of conversations about this when I’m teaching because many people are somehow under the impression that writing is easy and effortless. That some kind of divine inspiration makes the blank page suddenly transform into a perfectly edited book-length manuscript that publishers are clamoring for. 

If this is you, I’m sorry to burst your bubble, but that’s not really how writing or publishing works. Sure, there are definitely writers who are inspired. I can vouch for this personally, as the premise of my book is based around one scene that I dreamed, alongside many of my own experiences. When I hear specific kinds of music, I do get inspired to write. 

Writing is hard work and it takes a lot of effort to produce something good!

Writing isn’t easy OR effortless, though. Writing is hard work and it takes a lot of effort to produce something good! I think the main reason writers fail to live up to their expectations is because they underestimate the amount of work it takes to not just write a draft, but also then edit and refine the ideas.

They’ve seen other writers do it, so they assume they can, too.

After underestimating the amount of work, writers also tend to compare their own progress to others when setting goals - especially if they know other writers who are producing a lot of material.  

There are prolific writers who seem to produce a book every 3-6 months. To be frank, I don’t read many writers who do this simply because I can’t keep up and most of the genres don’t interest me much. I will say that certain genres are more formulaic than others, so it may be easier to fill that kind of quota. For instance, mysteries and romances typically follow a pretty standard set of plot sequences.

This isn’t to undercut the amount of work in the least! But if you already know the genre you want to work on has to meet X, Y, & Z landmark scenes, then you can work on filling in the rest perhaps more quickly than developing a whole new world with multiple races of creatures with all different languages and customs.

Just because someone else is cranking out novels doesn’t mean that’s a realistic or even good expectation to have for yourself. Only you know how much you can do, and for many of us, it takes longer and we do less than we thought. On the bright side, many times when you’ve taken a long time to work on a piece, it’s very satisfying to see it completed!

They see writers on social media and feel the need to compete.

In a digital world where we have access to almost infinite information, resources, and connections to other people, it makes sense that we might fall into the trap of comparing ourselves to others.

When we see what others are doing, we tend to raise our expectations, almost to compete with the writers we’re connected with online (even though most of us probably wouldn’t admit that).

Writers, in particular, tend to have a problem with this in the media and on social media. There are numerous ads claiming to have you writing a best-selling eBook in 30 days - heck, I’ve seen it promised in 14 days! There are even these weird little statements in commercials - I saw one the other day that was showing a string of excuses for not going out with friends because of acne & one of those was that she was “writing a book.” Um, what? 

Not to mention, there are many writers who produce a lot of work and therefore it always seems like they’re working on something shiny and new.

When we see what others are doing, we tend to raise our expectations, almost to compete with the writers we’re connected with online (even though most of us probably wouldn’t admit that). When we don’t live up to our newly raised standards, we feel like we’ve failed. 

How to Check Your Unrealistic Expectations at the Door (So You Can Actually Get on with Writing)

I’ll be the first to tell you that you should have high standards for yourself. I know I do, and I expect the people I work with to have them also. 

That being said, I don’t advocate for impossible standards. I’ve heard before that having higher expectations than you can reach helps you “strive for more” but honestly, in my experience, it really just makes you feel bad. And when you feel bad you don’t write, which is the opposite of what you want for your writing.

So here are some things that will help you check your unrealistic expectations at the door and get some real writing done.

1. Turn off all your media - I mean all of it. You have to stop comparing yourself to others. You also need to stop scrolling through social media and actually start typing or writing on the page. Do yourself a favor and log off of ALL socials and just be with your writing for a little while.

2. Assess your writing & progress honestly (but not critically). The only way you can really grow and be better is by being honest about where you are right now. You don’t have to share it, but you do have to acknowledge it so you can move forward. This doesn’t mean you need to say, “Oh, I suck at having a writing routine” - but perhaps acknowledging, “I need to work on developing a stronger writing routine.” You’ll be amazed how positive & honest self-talk improves your writing life. 

3. Set 1-2 smaller goals you know you can achieve according to how YOU write. Since you’re not on social media, and you’ve had an honest reflection of your writing, you can now set small achievable goals to help boost your writing confidence and get you moving forward. For example, in my own creative writing practices, I set a goal to write one section of my book a week. I know I wouldn’t keep up with it daily, but I find that usually one section a week is manageable.

4. Set a loftier goal to work on long-term. As you start to set and reach smaller goals, you’ll also need to set a bigger goal to work on long-term. This could be about when you’ll complete your manuscript or when you’ll have editing done. Whatever it is that would be a big next step for you that you don’t think you’d achieve in the next week or two. As an example, this year I set a goal to finish the rough draft of my book by the end of the year. It was a big goal, but one that I knew that I could work on with smaller steps.

5. Look at all of your goals each and every day. Repetition is your friend. I know it doesn’t seem like much, but looking at those goals written down every single day will greatly improve your mindset and ability to achieve those expectations you set for yourself. You can also write them down daily as affirmations. I do both. I have affirmations that I write down in my morning pages and a positive note for myself that I read every night before bed. It’s changed everything for me!

6. Take steps to make progress on your goals. The main way to meet your expectations is by taking action. Start with baby steps and use your small goals to help you move forward. Remember, progress is progress, even if it’s small! Keep taking those steps forward toward your goals every chance you can.

7. When you reach your goals, even the small ones, give yourself a reward. Then set a new goal to replace it. I know I love a good reward, and I’ll bet you do, too! When you work hard and reach those smaller goals, give yourself a little reward for your efforts. Things like a trip to Target (I love the dollar section) or a new book from your favorite author are perfect to keep you motivated and on track. When you’ve celebrated, set yourself another goal and move forward again!

Next Steps

There are a lot of reasons writers have unrealistic expectations for themselves, whether it’s because of comparisons with others or just plain old excitement. These unrealistic expectations can be a real nuisance for progress, though! 

It’s time to tackle your unrealistic expectations and get on with your writing. Here’s what you can start with:

1. Turn off your news, socials, and get off Google. Just be alone with your music and your paper. 

2. Take an honest look at your writing. If you don’t have any writing yet, consider your process and why you haven’t started writing yet. Be honest, but not critical. Your inner critic doesn’t need a say in this conversation.

3. Set your goals. Think about what you could do this week and this month. What’s realistic for you? You can even use this free worksheet to help you!

4. Work on those goals & start seeing progress! Do the work, even if it’s just a little at a time. A half hour here, a late-night writing session there - whatever works into your writing process. Make time and effort and you’ll start to see progress. 

5. Get help being accountable (or setting goals if you’re stuck or overwhelmed!) If you need help setting goals or being accountable, let’s chat. I work with writers all the time on goal-setting and helping them stay on track. Read more about it here.
   

My challenge to you is to look your unrealistic writing expectation in the face today and tell it you’ve had enough and that you’re ready to write. 

Have you faced unrealistic expectations before? Overcome writing fears about not living up to expectations? Or maybe have some other inspirational tips for writers who need a little positive boost? I’d love to hear about your experiences and recommendations! Find me on social media or drop a comment below.

Let’s chat because you, my friend, are on your way to great writing.

10 Things No One Tells You as a New Business Owner

This week has been a bad mental health week for a number of reasons. It’s not just because my husband and I waited 4 hours to vote on Tuesday, or because I’ve felt behind since Monday. It’s not even the fact that baby Maxwell has to have a second eye surgery next week (most likely because of his own shenanigans).

It’s one of those things that everything adds up little by little and all the sudden just hits you without any warning.

Mental health is something people don’t talk about enough in business, if at all, even though it’s an absolutely essential piece of the conversation.

I’m not sharing this to complain, but I think mental health is something people don’t talk about enough in business, if at all, even though it’s an absolutely essential piece of the conversation.

So, despite the fact that I’ve had a different piece of content planned for 6 weeks or more, I’m going to share some things no one tells you about being a business owner because if you or someone close to you is thinking about starting a business, you need to know.

1) You can’t just drop your personal life at the door.

My very first job out of grad school was the only time I ever got any type of negative review in the workplace. The comments were glowing all the way until the end when it said, “You need to check your personal life at the door when you come to work.”

The ironic thing was that during the review I asked if my personal life had ever been a barrier in providing excellent customer service and the answer was a resounding “no,” after which I listened to a somewhat lengthy monologue about how it wasn’t a professional thing to bring your personal life to work. Professionals, my manager said, were able to check their emotions and focus only on work while at work.

Here’s the deal: life happens. In the 3 months leading up to that review, we were buying a house, my husband got diagnosed with Diabetes, I got diagnosed with a thyroid disorder, I broke a tooth that needed an expensive dental repair, I lived an hour away from work, and it was my first time in the full time 9-5 workforce.

Whether or not you work in an office or for yourself, there’s not always an option to check your personal life at the door when you’re doing business.

Whether or not you work in an office or for yourself, there’s not always an option to check your personal life at the door when you’re doing business. Especially when you’re working from home.

If we’re on Zoom during the day, there’s a good chance you might see my dogs (or hear them). You might see a neat pile of sewing supplies in the background, or I may not have a full face of makeup on.

The fact of the matter is that you have a personal life. Everyone does! It doesn’t make you less professional that you have a hobby or pets in your house…that you live in. It doesn’t make you less professional to apologize for being a moment late to a meeting because your child is melting down from eLearning, or even because the last 30 minutes was your only break throughout the day and you just need a moment to stretch!

Ultimately, the best indicator of professionality is communication. Communicate often and clearly, and if that means sharing a little explanation for rescheduling a meeting than so be it. Of course, there is a time for ultra-formality, but it’s unlikely that this needs to be an everyday occurrence for most small business owners.

When you are the business owner, especially at the beginning when you’re the only one in your business, you have to be able to deal with life around you, and sometimes a little of that runs over into business life.  

2) What’s that thing you call work/life balance?

I am a huge advocate for balance in our lives. I firmly believe that making time for our own interests and our family and friends is critical to good mental health, and ultimately to living a fulfilling life.

But I’m gonna get real honest here for a moment: business ownership can be all-consuming. If you let it, it WILL be the only thing you think about days, nights, weekends, vacations – the whole shebang.

As my husband noted during the height of lockdown, I use work to process and deal with hardship and stress. I work harder instead of taking a break when I get worn out.

Business ownership can be all-consuming. If you let it, it WILL be the only thing you think about days, nights, weekends, vacations – the whole shebang.

I suspect many other business owners also face this conundrum. We feel like if we’re not constantly working our business will somehow collapse before our eyes. So, it’s really a fear mechanism that if we stop for a moment (which is healthy), everything we’ve worked so hard for will instantly vanish.

I’m not saying there’s not a chance of that happening. If 2020 has taught us anything it’s that nothing is guaranteed, and we should all be prepared to be flexible and pivot when we need to. What I am saying is that it’s possible to have a balance in your life without your business collapsing. It’s possible to go on vacation for a few days or a week and come back refreshed without thinking you’re going to come back to a pile of business rubble.

If you can’t take time away, you need to reconsider your business model.

3) Burnout is a SERIOUS issue that you HAVE TO deal with.

As you might suspect, working more and making more decisions is hard! Especially if you’ve never been in a leadership role.

When you begin to own your new leadership, it’s exhausting. There are some weeks you make more important decisions for your business than you might have made in a year in your personal life. Likewise, there may be many setbacks occurring all at once.

When you do this for long periods of time with inadequate relaxation and breaks, you get burnt out. Your business won’t seem nearly as fun, even if it’s what you love to do. Your motivation will slip, and you’ll find yourself making excuses to avoid work even when you know there are deadlines looming and your paycheck is on the line.

Burnout is a huge problem in the professional world, especially in a society that “hustles” so much. The reality is that you have to deal with this. You can’t just ignore it and keep working (or avoiding work).

Burnout is a huge problem in the professional world, especially in a society that “hustles” so much. The reality is that you have to deal with this. You can’t just ignore it and keep working (or avoiding work).

Let me share an instance of what happens when you ignore burnout. When we first got back from vacation in the beginning of September, I worked 7 days a week and literally made myself sick because I didn’t deal with the major burnout I had from jumping back in too fast.

Just yesterday morning I was doing my morning journaling and writing about how stressed I was because of X, Y, & Z and I found myself in tears but unable to just cry for a moment to let it out because I had an eminent video interview for a piece of content coming up in a few weeks. It’s time for a break, folks! Mental & emotional health absolutely effect your physical wellbeing and you have to take care of yourself first.

4) It’s overwhelming to learn how much you don’t know.

This might seem silly – after all, we don’t know what we don’t know, right?

 Wrong.

When you start a business there will almost certainly and immediately be a long list of things you know you don’t know. What’s overwhelming is the sheer amount and figuring out how the hell you’re going to learn it.

 A lot of it has to do with prioritization. Even if you have a list, priorities for a new business can shift every day. Some days you’ll need to know more about social media marketing, some days you’ll need to learn about bookkeeping, and some days you’ll just need to focus on how to plan for the learning you still need to do.

When you start a business there will almost certainly and immediately be a long list of things you know you don’t know.

 At some point, you’ll probably have the brilliant idea to hire people to help you, followed by a flurry of research and the realization that everything you need help with is expensive to hire out.

It’s okay that you don’t know all the things! And there are some things you probably will have very little interest in knowing much about – those are the things you will eventually hire out. Just remember that it takes time to be able to prioritize your time efficiently and effectively. It takes time to learn how all the pieces fit together, let alone how each one works on its own. It’s okay, just take one baby step at a time. It will start to come together.

5) There may not be anyone who you can ask for help.

I’m not sure if you have a network of entrepreneurs around you or not, but I certainly didn’t when I started my business. I didn’t know one person who owned a business, let alone an online business!

So, there was no one to ask for help when I was stuck.

Don’t underestimate the power of networking! I have found my new online peers to be extraordinarily helpful in growing my business.

It might be like that for you, or you might know some people who do something similar to what you want to do with your business. Either way, sometimes there’s just no one to ask – except maybe Facebook groups, most of which you don’t know everyone in the group very well.

Don’t underestimate the power of networking! I have found my new online peers to be extraordinarily helpful in growing my business. It might be uncomfortable at first, but fresh perspective is almost always helpful. Make it a priority early on to build a network of like-minded people who can help you when no one in your immediate personal circle has a clue what you’re doing, let alone how to help you.

6) People don’t always believe in or understand what you’re doing.

This might sound harsh, but it’s true. That doesn’t mean people don’t believe in you. Hopefully your inner circle of loved ones believes in you and your big dreams, even when they don’t understand how in the world you could make money at it.

My husband and I were talking about this recently because I met one of my major income goals for the year. I happened to say something about how I thought he felt like I was crazy for setting such a scary goal in January. To my surprise (and delight), he said something like, “Yeah, I did kind of think you were crazy.”

Sometimes you just have to be your own inspiration until others catch on.

Why would I delight in this?

Because the next thing out of his mouth was, “I didn’t really understand how you were going to do it, but I knew that if anyone could do it, it was you.”

Heart eyes, right?!

I, of course, laughed when he said he’d thought I was crazy. I knew it, just like I knew other people in my life had NO IDEA how I was going to make a living writing, let alone doing writing coaching. But I’m me, and that was enough knowledge for them to support me even when they didn’t understand. Sometimes you just have to be your own inspiration until others catch on.

7) Succeeding is scary.

I was making investments in myself and my business long before I was making profit.

And let me tell you, it’s SCARY.

Like, fingers shaking on the mouse before you click to pay. Like, wondering how in the world you were going to pay this back when you already have bills stacking up. Like, should I spend this money at all or should I keep hoarding it for a rainier day than today?

Unexpectedly, it’s also scary when you get your first client. And when you send the biggest invoice you’ve ever sent… and the client pays it without a question or second thought!

So weird, right?

It’s also a huge rush. I definitely wasn’t prepared to be nervous about billing for services I’d already completed.

8) Business requires infrastructure, even though you may not be in an office setting.

So, you know all those systems you used in your corporate job? The nice CRMs or the project management software? Maybe even the SOPs?

None of those are there in a brand new business.

Like, nothing.

You have to build all those things from the ground up, even if/when you know nothing about it.

Admin tasks are no joke! In the beginning, a ton of tasks you do will be administrative. It has to be that way because in order to really scale and grow you need those pieces in place.

Alternatively, you could pay someone to develop a system for you on top of whatever software you need. You can probably get by with free tools or ones you already have on your computer for a little while, but unless you designed all those beautiful spreadsheets and implemented bookkeeping at your old job it’s a lot of dang work! And even if you did those things, it still takes a long time and a lot of effort to build.  

And it has to be done. You can’t avoid it, just like you can’t avoid taking care of burnout. Admin tasks are no joke! In the beginning, a ton of tasks you do will be administrative. It has to be that way because in order to really scale and grow you need those pieces in place. You have to be able to tell where your money is going and where your projects are.

9) Providing services to others makes you question what your time is worth.

There’s nothing quite like a prospective client asking what your rate is for a service. There’s also nothing quite like having a client say that their budget is half your rate.

You immediately question whether your rate is appropriate and whether you could come down for this client only. You also feel like backtracking and saying, “Oh, did I say $40/hour? I meant for this other service. For what you want I’ll do $20/hour” even when you DON’T mean the other service.

The real question to ask yourself is what you bring to the table. What makes your service worth the money you charge for it?

When you offer services, realize that your ability to serve will be maxed out at some point. There are only so many hours in a day to do work, so in order to grow, you will eventually have to raise your rates and figure out how to diversify your income.

$20/hour seems like a lot – and it is a good amount! But when you’re a business owner you also have to think about how you’re going to grow.

You’re going to have to work a lot more of those $20/hour jobs than you would if you had a higher rate. The more jobs you take, the less time you’ll have to create a strong infrastructure and figure out how to do the business end of your business.

I will say that if you’re a complete beginner in your area, it’s not a bad idea to work for a lower rate at first to get some experience behind you. Get some social proof while you’re finding clients and building your business. But when you offer services, realize that your ability to serve will be maxed out at some point. There are only so many hours in a day to do work, so in order to grow, you will eventually have to raise your rates and figure out how to diversify your income.

10) If you love what you do in your business, it will probably be one of the best things you ever do.

I feel like the things I’ve talked about have been more on the negative side, but truly, being a business owner is incredibly rewarding!

It’s unlike anything else I’ve ever done, and probably unlike most things you’ve done, too.

It’s also the best thing I’ve done professionally, and I wouldn’t trade it for anything.

It’s also the best thing I’ve done professionally, and I wouldn’t trade it for anything.

You get to see your hard work get results, even if they’re slower than expected. You get to see progress and growth and opportunity. You get to experience the thrill of being the ultimate “boss” and make decisions that actually matter! You get to be you doing what you love, and what career offers that kind of opportunity better than your own business?

This week was a bad mental health week, and you know what? It’s okay. It’s okay that I’ve had to move a meeting here and there. It’s okay that I’m overwhelmed. I know it will pass.

But I didn’t feel that way when I first started my business. It’s still a work in progress, but it’s so important to talk about!

My challenge to you, especially if you’re thinking about starting a business, is to do one nice self-care thing for yourself this week and make it a habit!

Interview with an Author: Margarita Meyendorff

Our October guest is Margarita Meyendorff.

The daughter of a Russian Baron, Margarita Meyendorff (Mourka) was born displaced, far from the opulence of Imperial Russia that was her birthright. A series of wars destroyed this privileged existence, and Margarita’s life became a series of extraordinary moves. Her childhood ran like a roller coaster of highs as a performer and lows in her personal life. Her journey is thrillingly personal, yet universal - the journey we all take to find our true selves and safe haven. Margarita Meyendorff is always, even in the most frightening situations, a spirited traveler - and a survivor.

If you would like to purchase Margarita’s book, DP: Displaced Person, you can find a copy here.

Tell us a little about your writing journey. Have you always wanted to be a writer? 

I never dreamed that I would write a book someday.  My artistic endeavors were mostly in the performing arts – theatre, music.  I enjoyed writing and wrote journals when I was traveling but I never considered myself a writer.

Was there a certain point you remember where you felt empowered to call yourself a writer? Or have you always felt like you were a writer?

My writing journey began in the early 1990’s when I hired a friend who was an actress and a writer to co-write a one-woman play based on my life entitled “Mourka.”  I wrote the story and she stylized it into a play.  The play ended up going to off-Broadway theatres in New York.  Sigrid, my friend, directed it and I did the acting – memorizing 24 pages of script.

I didn’t realize it at that time, but “Mourka” was the beginning of my memoir.  Later, another actress friend started a theatre company called TMI (Too Much Information) where we wrote 10-minute pieces and performed them.  It was then that I realized I was writing chapters for a book.  I only felt empowered to call myself a writer when I finished DP.

Your book, DP: Displaced Person, is a memoir, and shares a lot of interesting, but intimate details. What was it like writing so openly about your life?

Through TMI, I realized that by telling/writing/performing the most intimate, often scary moments of my life, I was empowering other people to do the same – to face their fears and demons and start owning their feelings through the writing process. By accepting and witnessing our deepest fears, we eventually let go of them and can heal emotionally. 

I realized that by telling/writing/performing the most intimate, often scary moments of my life, I was empowering other people to do the same – to face their fears and demons and start owning their feelings through the writing process.

Writing intimate details in DP enabled me to clearly see my life – the “why’s” and the “therefores” and make sense of why I did what I did.  Writing DP helped heal me from depression and a great deal of anxiety.  I might add that I was in therapy while I was writing the book to help me look back and relive the darkest moments of my life.  I also had full support from my wonderful husband who has read everything I have ever written.

Your voice in the book is so powerful, but you do share stories that some people might find shocking. What was the reaction from your family and friends, especially considering that you come from a religious family?

I was extremely surprised at the incredible positive support I received from my Russian religious relatives in Nyack, NY where I grew up.  I was concerned that I would get a backlash of negativity and anger but instead I received a great deal of compassion from them. 

I’m not sure about the Lutheran relatives in Fort Wayne and in Wyoming.  Outwardly, everyone was nice to me and understanding, but I never felt that I received their true feelings.  My brother George thinks that the Lutheran “relies” put me up as an example of what happens to people when they don’t have a tight family or strong faith in religion.  If that is the case, then they did not follow the thread of healing through writing as a viable option.

I understand you’re working on a collection of short stories. That’s exciting! Could you tell us a little about it? 

I am very excited about “Flipping the Bird,” my new book.  Although it is not a memoir, it is still a collection of short stories based on my life and rooted in rebellion, survival, and fight against injustice.

Describe your writing and/or creative process.

I feel fortunate never to have experienced a writer’s block.  When I begin to write, I am certain of what I want to say.  The creative part is choosing how to put your thoughts down on paper.  I just let it rip and write.  I re-read sentences and paragraphs over and over until the writing feels right. If I get stuck on a word or a thought, I just write down what comes to mind and as I re-read, usually the thought finally gets articulated. 

I believe that if an idea is too difficult to articulate, it may not need to be there at all.

If a passage is particularly difficult, I throw it out.  I believe that if an idea is too difficult to articulate, it may not need to be there at all. I don’t struggle with it.  It’s counterproductive. I must add at this point, that I have an excellent editor who I trust.  I feel that a good editor is invaluable to a writer; that it is necessary for writers to have editors in the same way that plays have directors. 

There must be an objective eye on any artistic venture.  Not that I always agree with the editor, but for the most part, a good editor will enhance good writing. 

What was the research process like for your book? You were able to pull from your memories, of course, and some documents in the surviving family suitcase, but you give a lot of very interesting details from before you were born. Tell us a little more about how you were able to paint such a broad picture that serves as the background for your own story.

My brother George was an incredible source of information about the family’s history before I was born.  Of course, I knew a great deal from my parents as well.  I connected with childhood friends via email and asked questions like, “did this really happen?”

I connected with relatives all over the world. I used the internet for historical and general information.  I did a great deal of research on places and people and would not leave a stone unturned for fear of misinformation.

What was your biggest writing obstacle and how you did you overcome it?

My biggest writing obstacle was how to deal with my children (now grown) with the honesty and the integrity with which I was writing.  We had a therapy session together with my therapist one day when I read to them passages of the book that was particularly difficult for them to hear.  One of the most beautiful ramifications of my writing DP is that my children and I have become closer since my writing; we love and understand each other better and our relationship is invaluable to me.

What is the part of your published work or writing process you are most proud of?

I am very proud of writing DP Displaced Person.  For me, it was an incredible achievement with immense positive ramifications for my mind and spirit.  I understand now the healing power of writing.  I have learned how to be a better writer by working closely with my editor.  I am blessed with a creative mind and I thank my parents for bringing me up and surrounding me with art and culture.

What motivates you to keep writing?

Interesting and fun ideas motivate me to write.  I love the writing process – putting thoughts on paper into a cohesive manuscript that people might find interesting and valuable. For example, my third writing project will be entitled, “Gypsy Travel Guide for Senior Citizens.”  This project will allow me to pull together all my journals about my husband and I’s travel experiences with our VW Westfalia camper van, not only in the United States but in Europe as well. 

My advice to aspiring writers is to write about what inspires them; to write about what they find interesting and fun in this world.

The book will include recipes on how to cook gourmet meals on an open campfire, information on how to survive day to day road travel, information on places to camp and places to visit in the United States and Europe.  Because I enjoy the freedom of being on the road, I will enjoy writing about it.

What is the biggest piece of advice you would give to aspiring writers?

My advice to aspiring writers is to write about what inspires them; to write about what they find interesting and fun in this world.  If it is non-fiction – to be honest.  If it is fiction, then enjoy the freedom of the ride.

If you would like to purchase Margarita Meyendorff's book, DP: Displaced Person, you can find a copy here.

If you know an author (or of an author) you would love to read an interview with, email me at rachel@capturingyourconfidence.com or submit a suggestion through the contact page!

Welcome Holly, New Contributor!

Capturing Your Confidence is growing!

I’m very excited to welcome a new contributor to the team.

Over the past year and a half (if you can believe it’s already been that long), I’ve loved writing new content for you each week. I still do!

Adding Holly to the team will allow us to work on putting up more than one piece of content per week and keep up with the increasing interest in book reviews & interviews with authors!

Holly is a published author and blogger in the writing world. Reading and writing are her favorite things to do! She graduated from the University of New England majoring in English and minoring in Sociology, Psychology, and Women and Gender Studies.

Since then, she has been a substitute teacher, retail associate, office manager, and greenhouse associate, all while continuing to pursue her dream to be a full time writer.

Since the pandemic began, she determined it was time to dedicate herself to blog and writing full time! It has been a bit of a rollercoaster, but she has never felt more fulfilled. She’s very excited to begin a new adventure collaborating with Capturing Your Confidence!

We chatted with Holly to get to know her a little better.

Tell us a little about your writing.

I have been writing since I was in high school. I started out with realistic teen fiction, but have since discovered my love for writing fantasy! 

More recently I have begun blogging. I like to write about writing and reading! Writing tips, author interviews, book reviews and more can be found on my blog, livingthroughwriting.com.

If readers are interested in reading more about you and your writing, where can they find you?

If readers want to learn more about me, they can check me out on Instagram: @livingthroughwriting or my website livingthroughwriting.com. Those are the best places to learn more about me.

I am also on Twitter and Facebook - @holly5993 on Twitter and Living Through Writing on Facebook. 

What do you like to read?

I am a big fantasy fan, but sometimes a good old fashioned young adult romance novel is fun, too. Honestly I am easy to please as a reader, so almost any genre could intrigue me.

One of my must haves when I’m reading, though, is a romance story to follow, even if it’s not the main focus of the book.

One of my must haves when I’m reading, though, is a romance story to follow, even if it’s not the main focus of the book. Of course, even though I say it’s a must have, I’ve enjoyed books that don’t have a romance story in the past, but the story has to be really good for that to happen. 

What’s one tip you would offer to new writers?

I would say keep pushing onward. Sometimes life drags you down, or maybe other people, but you can’t let them take you away from what you love. If writing is what you want to do, do it!

Sometimes life drags you down, or maybe other people, but you can’t let them take you away from what you love. If writing is what you want to do, do it!

Don’t let anyone tell you you can’t, or shouldn’t, and don’t let yourself say those things either! I have had plenty of instances where I have doubted my capabilities as a writer, and though I’m not completely over those insecurities, I am much better for pushing onward and listening to praise rather than my own doubts.

Why are you excited to join the Capturing Your Confidence team?

I am so excited to join the Capturing Your Confidence team because I love everything that you stand for! Confidence is key when it comes to writing, and life. Once you find your confidence, you can do anything you set your mind to!

I am also excited to be working with new, fun people! Writing can be a lonely task at times, so it is always nice when you get to work with others on projects you love!

Let’s give Holly a warm welcome!

14 Books that Make Great Secret Santa Gifts

The holiday season is almost here! Soon it will be cold and we’ll be thinking about feasting at Thanksgiving and gift giving for Christmas. 

In preparation of the busy season (or if you’re an early shopper like me), I put together a list of some great books to give your Secret Santa this year - assuming they like to read! 

There’s a little something for everyone - Non-Fiction, Fiction, & Journals. As a writer & reader, I can vouch for all of these books! Some of them I’ve even done full book reviews on. 

“The trick to finding a great Secret Santa gift book is to keep it interesting to the person you’ll be giving it to & away from polarizing topics”

The trick to finding a great Secret Santa gift book is to keep it interesting to the person you’ll be giving it to & away from polarizing topics (like war, politics, etc.) unless you intimately know what their beliefs are. I try to focus on uplifting & books with a positive vibe, but that’s completely up to you! If your Secret Santa loves to have a good cry, by all means, get them a sappy story. 

Ultimately, there are always more choices - but these are some great picks to get you started!

---

NON-FICTION

---

You are a Badass - Jen Sincero

Brief summary: The full title of this book is You are a Badass: How to Stop Doubting Your Greatness and Start Living an Awesome Life. As the title implies, Sincero helps the reader step-by-step to figure out what’s holding them back, how to create a brand new badass mindset, and what to do with that new mindset.  You can read a full review here.

Why it’s a good pick: You might guess from the sunshine yellow cover that this book radiates positivity, and you’d be right. It only gets better as you read it! Unlike many self-help books, there is nothing implied about needing to “fix” yourself and it doesn’t preach at you. It’s all about learning, accepting, and growing. This book changes mindset, and can literally impact someone’s life in the best way - I know it did for me. I’m waiting with baited breath for a chance to give this as a gift. 

Who would love this book?: Anyone would enjoy this book, especially people who are looking for a positive kick in the pants positive attitude. 

Note: There is swearing, so it’s not necessarily for young readers.

Buy It Here

Everything is Figureoutable - Marie Forleo

Brief summary: Forleo’s little phrase “Everything is Figureoutable” is making big waves for people everywhere. Her goal is to show readers that “the power isn’t out there, it’s in you.” Forleo uses her own experiences and those of other figureoutable success stories from all over the world to show that you can figure out anything that comes up in your life - even if it’s the worst of the worst. You can read a full review here.

Why it’s a good pick: This was the first “self-help” book I read - I preordered it actually, because I was taking a webinar with Marie and she’s magnetic. I never once read a self-help book before this, and in fact, I kind of scoffed at them. They’re lame, right? WRONG. This book. Seriously. It’s a game-changer for anyone who reads it & actually does the work. It literally shows you how to be a better & more positive you. I have given it as a gift more than once!

Who would love this book?: People who dislike self-help books, anyone who’s wants to be their best self without changing who they are, & anyone who’s ready to take action to make their dreams come true (even if they don’t know where to start)

Note: There is swearing, so it’s not necessarily for young readers. 

Buy It Here

Educated - Tara Westover

Brief Summary: This is a memoir, so Westover is telling about her life growing up in a survivalist Mormon household in Idaho. When she’s 17 she goes to college - setting foot in a classroom for the first time ever. Westover’s is a tale of incredible self-discovery and growth despite tremendous odds. It shows the interesting dynamics of a family lifestyle that most people only see on TV. Most of all, it shows perseverance and strength. You can read a full review here.

Why it’s a good pick: Even though it’s a memoir, Educated reads like a novel - one that you won’t want to put down. The subject is fascinating, and Westover’s voice is powerful. It’s even more powerful when you understand that this woman, who is only in her mid-30s, went through it all. It’s definitely a more serious read, but still feels positive and hopeful. 

Who would love this book?: People who love a powerful story, educators, people who support education, people who love to learn about cultures & beliefs different than their own, people who love a good underdog story

Buy It Here

The Devil in the White City - Erik Larson

Brief Summary: The full title of this book is The Devil in the White City: Murder, Magic, and Madness at the Fair that Changed America. Larson weaves the tale of multiple important members of history. Arguably, the most “thrilling” story is that of H.H. Holmes who is thought to be one of America’s first serial killers. 

That being said, there are a number of other stories intertwined, such as architect Daniel Hudson Burnham who built many famous buildings across the U.S. & directed the World’s Fair in Chicago in 1893. Larson paints a pretty comprehensive picture of the time and goings-on during a very exciting & innovative time in American history. 

Why it’s a good pick: Larson is an amazing writer and historian. He writes history that reads like a novel and makes it exciting. The people come alive and you’re, at once, wondering how no one has caught this madman yet (H.H. Holmes), but entranced by the fact that the world around him is just building the first Ferris Wheel (thought impossible at the time) and getting electric lighting. It’s a good story, but it’s also an interesting learning experience. Larson has many other books, too, so when your Secret Santa loves the book, they’ll have plenty more to read!

Who would love this book?: People who love history, people who love serial killers & creepy murderers, people who are interested in architecture, people who are interested in invention & inventing, people who are into the darker parts of history, people who are from Chicago or Indiana

Note: This book depicts some creepy & gruesome elements

Buy It Here

Half Broke Horses - Jeanette Walls

Brief Summary: Walls tells the tale of her spunky and incredibly strong grandmother, Lily Casey Smith. From breaking horses with her father on the ranch at 6 years old to leaving home at 15 and riding 500 miles alone with her horse to be a schoolteacher on the western frontier, Lily exhibits an incredible outlook on life for someone who has survived so much hardship. 

Why it’s a good pick: I guess there’s a theme here for historical books that read like novels! If you’ve read any of Walls’s other books (like The Glass Castle), you know she has a very unique voice that’s just so good at telling stories. This book feels like the incredible story your grandma told you when you were little that you never wanted to end. Not only is there an element of history, but Lily’s sheer willpower and strength makes you want to stay till the end just to find out what happens.

Who would love this book?: People who like history, people who are interested in American history & the frontier, people who are interested in survival during hardship stories, people who like strong heroines, people who enjoy strong female characters, people who like learning

Buy It Here

---

FICTION

---

The Enlightenment of Bees - Rachel Linden

Brief Summary: Mia West, an apprentice baker, has her life planned out. Except she didn’t plan to lose her apprenticeship or her fiance. Not quite knowing what else to do, Mia goes on a humanitarian trip with her friend and roommate Rosie. She sees the world in a new way, and starts to understand that sometimes the small things - the things we love - can have a big impact in the world. Oh, and a little romance, of course.

Why it’s a good pick: This book is a delight. It’s light and positive, but it has the depth to question what we really want in life through Mia’s journey around the world. On the surface it may seem like a simple romance, or a journey to self-discovery. To an extent it is both of those things. But it’s also about the world - how we see it and how we learn from it. Completely unexpected and fun. 

Who would love this book?: People who like travel, people who like baking, people who like romance, people who like humanitarian work, people who like unexpected twists, people who love to fall into a good book, people who like learning about the world, people who like thinking about and changing their perspective

Buy It Here

The Night Circus - Erin Morgenstern

Brief Summary: Marco & Celia: marked as magical competitors from an early age, but never saw each other until adulthood. A black and white circus that only opens at night, and moves around at will, appearing as suddenly as it disappears. A challenge - the “game” - that can only be won by a single competitor...or can it?

Why it’s a good pick: This book has a little bit of everything: mystery, intrigue, romance, magic, and a fascinating magical circus! Morgenstern has a talent for words, and this book will draw anyone in who loves a little bit of a mystery. Morgenstern creates a magical world that we’d all like to live in - not too outlandish, but interesting enough to keep us wanting to know more. 

Who would love this book?: People who like magic, people who like mystery, people who like intrigue, people who like romance, people who like games & challenges on an epic scale, people who like books, people who like magical worlds

Buy It Here

Peyton Place - Grace Metalious

Brief Summary: Peyton Place is the story of Allison MacKenzie - a small town New Hampshire girl that longs to be a writer. Because of the small town culture, expectations, and her own mother, Constance MacKenzie, she finds herself stifled. 

Why it’s a good pick: Throughout the novel, Metalious writes of things heretofore unheard of - illicit sex, drunkenness, incest, secret lives, and more - that happen in small towns everywhere. But when it was published in 1956, people just didn’t talk about those things. It was a mega-hit, becoming a TV series and film. Suffice it to say, it’s juicy!

Who would love this book?: People who like reality television, people who love drama, people who are interested in the goings on in their town or city, people who like rebellious women, people who are interested in knowing more about small towns or are from a small town, people who like scandal, people who have heard of the book and/or TV series & movie, people who like tabloid magazine

Note: There is a lot of mature content, so this book definitely isn’t for young readers.

Buy It Here

The Look of Love - Sarah Jio

Brief Summary: Jane Williams is a florist, and on an average day, feels like her life is pretty boring. It’s just her and her dog Sam. But what Jane doesn’t know is that the mysterious “eye problem” she’s had since she was a little girl is actually a gift - the gift of being able to see love in all its various forms. When she turns 29, a mysterious stranger sends her on a life-changing adventure that she must complete before her 30th birthday. Will she be able to find true love for herself - before it’s too late?

Why it’s a good pick: This book is just plain fun. Whether you’re a hopeless romantic or not (I’m not and I still loved the book), the way Jio weaves the story is enchanting. It’s a completely different look at love as we know it. 

Who would love this book?: People who like romance, people who like happy endings, people who like falling into a good book, people who want to read but who want it to feel easy, people who live in the Seattle area, people who like a little mystery but not too much, people who love love

Buy It Here

---

JOURNALS

---

Affirm Your Life - Becca Anderson

Brief Summary: The full title of this book is Affirm Your Life: Your Affirmations Journal for Purpose & Personal Effectiveness. This cute little journal is literally about bringing positivity to your life. It’s based on Stephen Covey’s 7 Habits of Highly Effective People, and has areas where you can do some soul-searching and personal development. 

Why it’s a good pick: First of all, this book is pretty! Like, physically pretty in the way it’s designed. It’s also not overwhelmingly large. At just over 150 pages, it is something that can easily be carried and filled in without feeling like you have a brick in your bag. It’s awesomely positive, and teaches strategies you can keep using while still feeling good about it. 

Who would love this book?: Writers, small business owners, creatives, artists, people who like writing, people who like journaling, people who like and/or are working on personal development, people who enjoy introspection, people interested in self-growth

Buy It Here

The  Checklist Book - Alexandra Franzen

Brief Summary: This handy book isn’t just full of lists for you to fill in - it actually teaches you how to make effective lists to organize your life! Even if you’re someone who already uses a lot of lists, Franzen provides interesting facts & history about checklists, as well as the how-to aspect. Did you know there’s actually science about checklists? I didn’t! But Franzen did, thank goodness.

Why it’s a good pick: As someone who is probably unusually organized in most ways, it just makes sense to me that anyone would want to read more about lists. Then I think, not everyone is quite as obsessed as I am. Hah! This is still a good pick because it’s fun and useful - and unlike a true “journal,” it’s part book, part activity, and all around helpful.

Who would love this book?: People who like lists, people who thrive off of achieving, people who are super organized, people who aren’t very organized, people who are interested in organization, people who like learning, people who are overwhelmed or have large to-do lists

Buy It Here

You Should be Writing - Brenda Knight & Nita Sweeney

Brief Summary: The full title of this book is: You Should be Writing: A Journal of Inspiration & Instruction to Keep Your Pen Moving. This journal has plenty of space and inspiration to get your creativity kick started. And a few tips & tricks, of course.

Why it’s a good pick: If you’ve been around many writers, you’ve probably heard the term “I should be writing” or seen a prominent post-it note or meme that says, “You should be writing.” Actually, starting & keeping a writing routine is the hardest thing for many writers! So this book is a great and thoughtful way to help someone out.

Who would love this book?: Writers, journalers, creatives, people who like writing, people who like creating but are stuck

Buy It Here

Overcoming Creative Anxiety - Karen C.L. Anderson

Brief Summary: The full title of this book is: Overcoming Creative Anxiety: Journal Prompts & Practices for Disarming Your Inner Critic & Allowing Creativity to Flow. This journal takes a deep dive into the inner critic & how you can change the way you interact with it. 

Why it’s a good pick: Everyone’s got an inner critic! Some of us are good at controlling it, but it’s hard, especially, it seems, for creatives and writers. I’ve written about it before, but this journal goes even deeper into how it makes you feel, the ways you can talk to it, and how to strengthen what Anderson calls your inner advocate. Very uplifting! 

Who would love this book?: Writers, creatives, artists, people who want to create more but are afraid, people who struggle with a mean inner critic, people who like journaling, people who like writing, people who want to do some personal growth & development

Buy It Here

The 52 Lists Project - Moorea Seal

Brief Summary: This fun journal gives a journal prompt/list for each week of the year. It’s broken down into the 4 seasons, and each season has prompts relevant to the time of year. For instance, the first list of the journal is “List your goals and dreams for this year.”

Why it’s a good pick: A journal can be a really thoughtful gift, especially for the people in your life you know enjoy writing or sharing their feelings. The major perk of this journal is that it already has areas for each week of the year, so there’s less pressure to do it “correctly” or fill it in however you like. You simply open it up and it’s ready to go!
Who would love this book?: Writers, artists, creatives, anyone who likes to journal, anyone who likes lists, anyone who is introspective, anyone who is working on personal development

Buy It Here

---

NEXT STEPS

---

1. Look at the books for potential gift ideas - Don’t be shy! Check out Amazon, go to your local library and read a little of it. See how you feel about it before you decide. 

2. Figure out what your Secret Santa is interested in - Before you pick something, make sure to think about what your Secret Santa will like. If they’re not a writer, they may not want a journal that shows them how to overcome creative anxiety. Or if they like reading lighter books that they don’t want to think too much about, a heavier memoir or non-fiction book might not be the best pick. 

3. Buy the book(s) & get ahead of the game! - Use the links above or Google where you can pick up a copy of the book. You’ll be done before you even started thinking about it last year!

My challenge to you is to start thinking about what the people in your life like to read or learn about now instead of a month or 6 weeks from now. 

Given a Secret Santa book before? How’d it go? Did I miss a “must have”?  I’d love to hear from you! Find me on social media, drop a comment below, or email me at rachel@capturingyourconfidence.com!

Let’s chat because you, my friend, are on your way to great gift giving. 

7 Reasons Writers Need Growth Mindset

I am a big proponent of learning and personal development. You could say it’s a passion, but in truth, it’s also a strength of mine that I happen to enjoy. 

Around this time of year, with fall semester in full swing, I think fondly of the first time I heard the term growth mindset. It wasn’t until grad school! I’ve always wondered how my college experience might have been different if I’d known about it earlier. 

I’ve come to the conclusion that I learned about it exactly when I most needed it. 

So now I talk about it with almost everyone. Students in the classroom, colleagues, members of my professional network, the list goes on. 

One of my favorite groups to talk with about growth mindset is writers. 

What is Growth Mindset?

Although you’ve probably heard of the growth mindset before, you may not be familiar with the term itself. It simply means that someone believes they can learn and improve skills. 

First coined by psychologist Dr. Carol Dweck (known worldwide for her work with mindset) in her book, Mindset: The New Psychology of Success, growth mindset established the idea that a person’s belief about their abilities was equally important to the abilities themselves. That people actually can improve when they believe their hard work will positively impact & grow their skills. 

“Growth mindset established the idea that a person’s belief about their abilities was equally important to the abilities themselves.”

This might not seem ground-breaking, but it’s still changing the face of education today. It’s a completely different model than fixed mindset, which is the idea that you are born with the skills you have, and that no matter how hard you work, you’ll still have the same skills. It’s so common in the classroom that any teacher you ask has probably had more than one student say something along the lines of “I’m just not good at XYZ.”

I know that happens in writing classrooms, and in fact, I’d estimate that more than 50% of the students I’ve taught have some kind of fixed belief about writing. Even outside the classroom, it’s breathtaking how many professionals and writers believe that good writing is based on talent instead of improvable skills.

So why is the belief that you can learn and improve so important for writers? 

7 Reasons Writers Need Growth Mindset

The fact of the matter is that writing is a skill. It’s not a table of numbers or letters, or a set of facts you can memorize. It’s a skill that can be developed and honed with practice and dedication. 

Having a growth mindset is critical for writers because it:

1. Encourages Learning - When you know you can build a skill, it encourages you to learn more about it, test it, and even try it out for yourself. And so it is with writing and growth mindset. Writing is much less scary when you think about it in terms of learning rather than overcoming your own perceived deficiency. 

2. Encourages Personal Growth - Building new skills is a great way to grow as a person (and a professional). When you know you’re not stuck in the same skill set you’ve always had, it opens up opportunities to improve in places that interest you, including writing.

3. Enables Progress - Seeing our progress usually makes us feel good, right? Being able to look at where you were and see how far you’ve come is a feel-good scenario. What better way to see progress than by starting where you’re at with writing and intentionally learning and building upon your skills? Growth mindset allows us to know that even if we’re starting off in a place we’re not satisfied with in our skills, we can improve them and see our progress along the way.

4. Grows Self-Esteem - I don’t know about you, but when I learn a new skill or realize that I’ve gotten better at something I felt I could barely do before I get an immediate boost in self-esteem. Maybe this is because I am an achiever by nature, but it’s tremendously helpful for me to know that I can be better if I try. This is important for writers (many of whom also struggle with lower self-esteem) because when we’re more assured of ourselves, we’re stronger writers.

5. Grows Confidence - When our self-esteem grows, our confidence typically follows. Seeing progress and knowing you can improve skills is a simple way to boost your confidence. When you’re more confident, your writing will become stronger because you write with more conviction - you believe in it so others will be more likely to do so as well. 

6. Changes Understanding of Abilities - Probably the most profound thing a growth mindset does is change the way we think about ourselves as creatives. If you’re stuck in a fixed mindset, it’s hard to believe you can be a writer (even if it’s your biggest dream) when you feel like you got stuck with a set of subpar skills. When you start believing that you can change your skills and improve, it’s an immediate and life-changing improvement.  

7. Allows Big Dreams (On Purpose) - This is something we don’t talk about as much as we should, but when we feel like we’re stuck with our current skills and talents, we can’t really dream that big. If you “suck at math” how in the world could you be an astronaut someday? But what if, instead of thinking you’re stuck, you truly believed you could learn with hard work and dedication? “I suck at writing” could now become “I’m going to be a writer someday.” Life-changing, right? 

Next Steps

Growth mindset is so important, especially with all the tools available today, many of which are even free! The belief that you can learn and improve may seem simple, but it can change your life in a big way if you stay open to the possibilities. 

1. Read a little more about the growth mindset here & listen to Dr. Carol Dweck talk about it here. Take a little time and Google it. Read about it and listen to Dr. Dweck talk about it. Get a good understanding of the implications.

2. Accept that growth mindset will only help you succeed as a writer. Growth mindset really is a powerful tool for writers, and knowing that - and believing it - will help you succeed.

3. Begin acting on your new growth mindset. As always, practice makes perfect, right? Start practicing your new mindset right away. Places where this comes up often with writers is in starting new projects & rewriting. 

4. Get help with your new mindset. Sometimes we all need a little pick-me-up. Especially when we’re working on something new, or pivoting (thanks COVID-19). If you’re struggling with how a growth mindset could look in your creative life, or if you’ve figured it out but need some help getting there, I can help. I work with writers on this all the time because it’s hard! Doing it alone can make it harder, so why not enlist help? Click here to read more about how we can work together and get you on the right track. 

My challenge to you is to begin to intentionally accept a growth mindset into your life and writing.

Have you heard of the growth mindset before? Tried it? Found another way to use it with your writing? I’d love to hear about your experiences! Find me on social media, drop a comment below, or email me at rachel@capturingyourconfidence.com!

Let’s chat because you, my friend, are on your way to great writing. 

Book Review: Educated by Tara Westover (2018)

Overview

Tara Westover’s powerful memoir, Educated, is a testament to the strength of the human spirit. It challenges what many of us think we know not just about Mormon beliefs, but also religion in general. Above all, it makes you think about the way we see our lives, as well as others, and how becoming aware of other perspectives can literally change your life. 

Content & Message

Unlike many of the book reviews I’ve done recently, this book is not a self-help guide. It’s a memoir with 3 parts, which signal major shifts in Westover’s life. 

The first part brings readers through the young years and the ideology Westover grew up believing as the ultimate truth. It details her tumultuous and dangerous relationship with her father and brothers, as well as a strained relationship with her mother. At the end of the section, Westover is preparing to leave for Brigham Young University as a 17-year-old who has never been in a classroom. 

During the second part, readers learn about Westover’s college years. She has extreme struggles due to her lack of prior education. For example, in her first History class, she asked what the Holocaust was and everyone thought she was making an inappropriate joke even though she’d never heard of it. She also struggled because her parents always upheld strictly anti-medical establishment beliefs. 

Until she went away to college, she never considered that her father’s beliefs were anything but normal, and in this section we see her mind opening up to the possibility that there are other valid ways to live. At the end of the section, Westover is graduating as an outstanding undergraduate and preparing to go to grad school at Cambridge University in the United Kingdom (UK). 

The haunting image of Westover’s father’s fear stays with us as we head into the final section:

“If you’re in America,’ he’d whispered, ‘we can come for you. Wherever you are. I’ve got a thousand gallons of fuel buried in the field. I can fetch you when the end comes, bring you home, make you safe. But if you cross the ocean…’”

— Gene* Westover (Tara's Father)

“If you’re in America,’ he’d whispered, ‘we can come for you. Wherever you are. I’ve got a thousand gallons of fuel buried in the field. I can fetch you when the end comes, bring you home, make you safe. But if you cross the ocean…’” 

In the third part of the memoir, Westover tells of her time during grad school, the terrible accident that almost killed her father, and what would seem to be the ultimate family feud. Through lies and betrayal, Westover’s pain is palpable on the page and the only thing you can do is to keep reading to find out what ultimately happens. 

I won’t tell you the outcome, so as not to give a huge spoiler (I hate that), but I’ll say this: there was never a “winning” solution, as it often happens with messy family divides. Westover made the best decisions she could to become her own person and forged her own path to safety and success. 

Biggest Takeaway

There are so many lessons we can learn from this incredible story, but I think the biggest of them all is that anything is possible.

Sometimes we have to make decisions that others don’t approve of or like to get to the places we want to go - even sacrifices - but there are possibilities around every corner. 

“Sometimes we have to make decisions that others don’t approve of or like to get to the places we want to go”

Overall Impressions

Ever since this book came out in 2018 it has been on my “To Read” list for the sheer intrigue of the thing. Reading non-fiction has become a new interest of mine, but as an educator and someone who highly values and advocates for education, I was immediately drawn to it, even before I read the jacket cover blurb.

When I started it, I couldn’t put it down.

I read all 334 pages probably within the span of about a week that involved many late nights where I had to force myself to close the book and go to sleep. Part of the draw was, undoubtedly, the marked difference between Westover’s experience and mine.

It was wild envisioning the world her words created, and then to know that they’re all true! Seeing the tenuous family bonds and the raw look into the end days prepper ideology was truly fascinating in a way that made me really consider what I believe and why. 

I think my favorite part is the prose itself. I find Westover’s voice magnetic. It’s not overly fancy or academic, which I thoroughly appreciated. It’s open, honest, and incredibly vulnerable, which are all things I look for in non-fiction because how can you write an honest memoir without them?

My long-time anticipation for reading this book was heartily fulfilled and it way exceeded what I could have hoped for. Westover will definitely be near the top on the list of authors I eagerly hope for more writing from sometime soon. 

Why Writers Need this Book

As a writer myself, this book is an amazing example of how powerful words can be. 

“It’s important to read from all genres when you’re a writer because it strengthens the way in which you can use your own words.”

It’s important to read from all genres when you’re a writer because it strengthens the way in which you can use your own words. It shows you what others have done, and allows your creativity to wander and consider what else could be done - what you could do. 

The memoir also does an excellent job of showing that you don’t necessarily need to use “fancy” language to write a great book. Seriously. There are times when “$5 words” work really well, but not if you don’t normally use them in that way. 

There is no point during the entire memoir where it feels like Westover is uneducated or less intelligent because she uses clear and simple language. It’s much better to write clearly and expressively than to clog up the ideas with words that make everything feel disjointed. 

Next Steps

There are a few steps to take next: 

1. Get the book here. (Or here or here). Better yet, check your local library! Easy peasy.

2. Read the book & take it in. 

3. Start telling your own story. If you read the book and are fired up to tell your story (go you!), go for it! Memoir isn’t the only way to tell your story, so don’t be afraid to get creative. 

If you need some help getting started, or figuring out how to organize your ideas, I can help, too! I work with writers just like you on planning, strategy, and accountability. Because I’m also a confidence coach, I will empower you and encourage you every step of the way. If you’re intrigued or READY TO GO, you can click here to read more about working with me. Let’s get your story out into the world! 

My challenge to you is to consider your own beliefs and story as you read this book.

Have you read the book? What did you think? What was your favorite part? I’d love to hear about your experiences! Find me on social media, drop a comment below, or email me at rachel@capturingyourconfidence.com!

Let’s chat because you, my friend, are on your way to great writing.

Interview with an Author: Dr. Vanessa Rapatz

Our August guest is Dr. Vanessa Rapatz.

Vanessa Rapatz is an Assistant Professor of English at Ball State University. She studies and teaches early modern British literature as well as studies in drama, and special topics on sexuality, gender, and performance. She is the author of Convents and Novices in Early Modern English Dramatic Works: In Media Res. She has also published in Studies in English Literature and co-authored a chapter on women's collaboration in Shakespeare for an Ashgate edited collection.

If you would like to purchase Vanessa Rapatz’s book, Convents and Novices in Early Modern English Dramatic Works: In Media Res, you can find a copy here.

Tell us a little about your specialty studies.

I study early modern (Renaissance) British literature with a focus on drama. I am particularly interested in gender, performance, and material culture in the context of religious/political shifts and upheavals.

Tell us about your writing journey. Have you always wanted to be a writer?

I definitely always practiced writing and realized that it was something I had a knack for in high school, but it took some time to realize that it might be something I could do professionally.

I was drawn to theater and journalism initially, but I ended up feeling at home in my college English courses and particularly found that I thrived on discussing, or really arguing and about, the possible interpretations of literary texts. My best writing happens when I feel like I’m engaging in a complex conversation.

Where did the idea or inspiration for your book Convents and Novices in Early Modern English Dramatic Works: In Medias Res come from?

The simple answer is that it developed out of my dissertation project that, itself, was inspired by connections between plays I was reading in a graduate seminar and plays that I was teaching to undergraduates. I kept thinking about these dramatic women who found themselves at the thresholds of convents or marital alliances in plays that were written after Catholicism had been outlawed in England.

The women weren’t demonized or made fun of as so many Catholic figures were in the wake of the Protestant Reformation; so I became interested in the types of options their performances might allow us to imagine both in the historical context of the plays themselves and in our own contemporary discussion of gender and/as performance and the ways spaces affiliated with Catholicism were converted, much like the patriarchy represented in these plays sought to convert the women themselves.

I’m a feminist critic; so, I’m always looking for traces of female agency in texts that try to subvert such agency. Of course, I was most likely drawn to these Catholic figures and the convents they might seek to inhabit because I was raised Catholic and have been steeped in that culture. Digging into this religious history helped me understand family and hometown traditions as much as it helped me think critically about the plays I was analyzing.

Are there other books you’ve authored or collaborated on? If so, can you tell us a little about them?

This is my first book. I did co-author a chapter on female collaboration in Shakespeare with John Garrison and Kyle Pivetti for a book of collected essays titled Attending to Early Modern Women: Remapping Routes and Spaces published by Ashgate.

What was your process for writing the book?

Because I was revising my dissertation, I basically charted out the chapters that I felt were the most polished, that needed a bit less revision than the others, and started with those first. I also needed to update my scholarship and theoretical frames, because I finished the dissertation back in 2011.

I am lucky to have various support networks of colleagues and friends. So, each chapter would get sent off to at least one friendly reader as I pushed on to the next. I could then go back to the reader feedback and make sure I was making through-lines and improvements across all five chapters. That’s the big picture of the process.

On the micro level, I figured out deadlines and made writing and research schedules to try to meet those deadlines. It took a community and a lot of structure to create the book.

Academic writing, and oftentimes creative writing, requires a lot of research! Can you describe a little bit about how the research process works with your writing?

Research is my favorite part of the writing process! It’s like detective work. I’m a sucker for a good detective narrative and maybe wanted to be Clarice Starling when I was in junior high school. I love having a stack of books on my desk and searching through databases to compile a literature review.

Pages and pages of notes on literary criticism, historical analysis, and theory ultimately help me shape my initial research questions into the beginning of an essay or a chapter, as I make connections that I wasn’t expecting. The only tricky part is knowing when to stop, when to stop reading (never, really) and digging to focus on the writing. 

Describe your biggest writing obstacle and how you overcame it.

I don’t think I want to answer this in the past tense. My biggest obstacle is finding regular time to focus on my writing and holding myself accountable. My dissertation advisor always said that I had a great deal of task energy, by which she meant that I would often delay my writing process by directing my attention to more manageable and completable tasks.

One of my friends calls this virtuous procrastination. It’s that moment when you’re sitting in front of your computer feeling stuck and frustrated and instead of working through that block, you think, “there’s a pile of dishes in the sink, if I washed them at least I’d be accomplishing something.” And, honestly, sometimes you do need to get the tasks out of the way to clear up headspace to focus, but those things can also keep you from getting into the habit of sitting down and pushing through.

Sometimes you really do just need to put your butt in the chair. Starting with my dissertation, I found one of the best ways to do this was through accountability groups. I’m the member of a Facebook group that focuses on writing every day, which involves logging daily word and time achievements and providing support and advice to other writers. I also participate in a writing group made up of Ball State English department colleagues; we take turns sharing and responding to each other’s writing. During the COVID-19 pandemic, I’ve been attending regular Zoom sessions with two of my close friends from grad school. We check in, set goals, and then mute our Zoom for a set time and check in on what we got done.

Could you talk a little bit about the publishing process? How does it work, how long it typically takes, etc.

This varies quite a bit depending on publishers from what I can tell. In my case, I first sent a book proposal to a general editor in answer to a call for manuscripts that related to the series “Late Tudor and Stuart Drama: Gender, Performance, and Material Culture” that Medieval Institute Publications was launching. At that point, I had the dissertation, but had only really substantially revised two chapters.

The series editors were interested in my proposal and asked for sample chapters, so I sent off what I had. Based on the samples, they wanted to see more. Most often this means you finish the full manuscript and resubmit it for review, but because I’m on the tenure track and need proof of publication progress, my general editor worked with me to secure a contract based on my introduction and a revision of the sample chapters.

Once the manuscript was submitted it was sent out for anonymous peer review and then back to me to respond to reviewer comments. Once the series editors were satisfied with my revisions, the monograph went into pre-production (copy-editing, choosing the cover, etc.) and then finally to production and publication. I was teaching full-time throughout the process, which took about three years.

What is the part of the book (or process) you are most proud of?

Holding the actual thing in my hands! But also, I am really proud of the way my thinking and writing has developed through the process and over time. It’s a substantial revision that shows my development as a scholar.

Do you have plans for another book or additional published writing in the future?

Absolutely! I currently have a chapter for a volume about the religious marketplace in early modern England under review. I’m also in the early reading and research phases of a new project that focuses on English Civil War dramas.

Do you, or would you ever consider, doing creative writing? If so, how do you think that differs from your academic writing?

Honestly, creative writing is not my thing. I so admire my colleagues and friends who build fictional worlds and so eloquently turn out beautiful poetry and prose. I will continue to devour and teach their work. My creative outlets are focused more in the kitchen, I think.

Since your audience is primarily academics for this book, how do you think your writing & process differs from how it is in other writing contexts? Or maybe the better question is, is there a difference for you in how you approach this formal academic writing versus writing for other audiences?

Definitely. When you’re writing for an audience of scholars and students, you are using specific conventions and terms. In less formal writing, I’m much more conversational, as I am in this interview. That said, I do still strive to maintain a balance in my academic writing. I still want to be clear and engaging in any context. Sometimes I succeed.  

What do you want the world to know about you as an author?

Wow, that’s a tough question. I guess I want them to know that I’m an inquisitive author. That I think about learning and critical thinking as a constant process. My writing and analysis evolves through that process and hopefully makes it onto the page in a way that opens up a conversation with which my readers might want to engage.

What is the biggest piece of advice you would give to aspiring writers?

First, find out what excites you, what you obsess over and want to live in for as long as you can stand it. Then, keep working at every day.

---

If you would like to purchase Vanessa Rapatz's book, Convents and Novices in Early Modern English Dramatic Works: In Media Res, you can find a copy here.

If you know an author (or of an author) you would love to read an interview with, email me at rachel@capturingyourconfidence.com!